Life lessons for Lola

I have read a lot of posts about the top things to tell/teach your children.  Well I feel that I have a lot of wisdom to pass onto my daughter and just in case I forget some things, I figured I would write it down so she can look back on it.  I am a firm believer that you must live through your own experiences but these will be my “I told you so” moments with her. 

1.      Never, ever bully anyone.  It’s not nice and let’s face it, that nerd that gets made fun of today might very well own the company you want to work for tomorrow. 

2.      Always be a lady. It might seem cool to be one of the guys but trust me, it isn’t.  You should own several purses, be able to rock skirts and dresses, properly walk in heels and know how to accessorize.  Some of these things I learned later in life and I regret that.

3.      At the same time though, learn about sports.  Nothing is hotter than a pretty, feminine girl who can debate about the Eagles’ most recent trades. 

4.      Get over your fear of getting waxed and keep up with it.  You are my daughter and therefore, biweekly trips to the salon are inevitable. 

5.      I hope you get your heart broken at least once.  It will help you realize that all things don’t work out the way you plan.

6.      I hope you break at least one heart.  It will help you realize you are not perfect.

7.      Date a bad boy at least once.  This will be an incredibly fun time for you, it will momentarily break your father’s heart, making him realize you are not perfect and it will help you recognize and love the good guy once he comes along.

8.      Someday, someone will call you a bitch, whore and/or slut.  It is up to you whether or not that person is right.  Please, prove them wrong. 

9.      Set realistic goals for what you want to do.  If you can’t carry a tune, don’t try to be a pop singer.  If you barely pass your science classes, chances are you won’t be a doctor.  Find what you are good at and like and do that. 

10.  Learn to apply makeup well.  You are of course going to be a natural beauty, so learn to apply just enough to enhance that beauty and not damage or conceal it. 

11.  If you go to college, and I hope you do, live on campus at least one year and study abroad at least one semester.  It will give you a new perspective on life.

12.  Always remember that everyone has a smart phone.  If you think it will be funny to flash your lady parts to a group of guys, it isn’t and it will be recorded and end up on the internet, where your father will undoubtedly find it.

13.  Never do anything that will make you lose respect for yourself.  Simple enough.